Current Issue Articles

Rancho Oso

Bear Essentials for Fun

Story and Photos by Jessica Schley

What do Charlie Chaplin and P.. Diddy’s wife have in common? They’ve both been guests at the Rancho Oso Resort…

Howdy Pardner - Welcome to Rancho Oso

If you want an authentic adventure, there’s one waiting for you at Rancho Oso. Bear sightings hopefully not included.
Step out of your car and onto the dusty trails aboard one of the trusty steeds this ranch is so famous for. Have an experience unparalleled by any reality TV program, even ones that have featured Rancho Oso on their show. You’ll ford a river, climb rocky hills, and christen your new pair of boots with some cow manure, if you’re lucky.

  Rancho Oso has it all: Not just trail rides for greenhorns or Reality Buckaroos. You can take a roping lesson, herd cattle, watch a bull riding demo, and even learn how cowboys train their cow-dogs to “Git him up,” “Come by” and “Look behind!” All this and a covered wagon for you to sleep in, too!
  Imagine stepping back in time to the boulders and stagecoach robbers, not speed demons driving Mercedes! If you’re a weary traveler, you’ll enjoy the change of pace at Rancho Oso, where even the bears are on vacation.
  The stagecoach used to stop near the historic ranch, on the way to and from the Santa Ynez Valley, offering its passengers a much-needed respite from the perilous mountain passes and the tribulations of 19th century travel. You can still find that respite there, where the pace is much slower, but the WiFi is just as fast. Whatever you’re looking for in terms of recreation, be it a hot tub, a swimming pool, or a mini golf course, you can find it somewhere between the horse corrals and the Chuck Wagon. There’s even a country store where you can rent horseshoes to throw around in the horseshoe pits, or DVDs to use in the two lodges --which come equipped with satellite so you can watch the big game. They also sell food, beer and wine, so you can have a regular old shindig, with all the fixings.
  The 310-acre guest ranch was once part of the historic Rancho Los Prietos land grant. There is a small fee to enter the grounds, but you get a lot of bang for your buck, and we don’t mean from a six-shooter! Lots of people bring their horses camping with them, and keep them in pipe corrals next to the campsites. You can stay in a covered wagon, a cabin, or your own RV or tent. There are many trails to choose from: hour long to full day rides, since the ranch is completely surrounded by National Forest. When you get back, there’s a heated pool to lounge in, and an adult lodge where you can escape from the kids and fix a refreshing drink.
  Bill Krzyston has been the General Manager of Rancho Oso for eleven years. He says about the unique experience, “This place

offers something for everyone. But it’s also very laid back and nonchalant.” Nonchalant is the word. It’s part of the western tradition to take it easy, even while working hard. Bill and his Kelpie cow-dog Cutter oversee the entire facility, which is quite an undertaking, in a classically cowboy way. They go everywhere together. If Bill’s on a horse, Cutter is out on the trail in front of him (as on the cover of this issue!). If Bill’s out feeding the cattle in his truck, guess who’s riding shotgun. If his owner is checking on the RV campsites,Cutter is guarding the golf cart from being

Bill Krzyston, left, at the old springhouse, which kept foods fresh before refrigeration was available.

stolen by coyotes. If you ever want to know whether a man’s a real cowboy, watch how he treats his dog. By that test, Bill’s a genuine guy. Cutter works very hard, but he’s a family dog, too. He sleeps in the house with Bill’s son at night, but waits by the door at dawn to go check on the cattle. The dog’s work ethic mirrors his owner’s.
There have been some rather high profile guests at the ranch in recent years. One episode of Bad Girls, an Oxygen Network show, was filmed at the Ranch. Sean “P.. Diddy” Combs’ wife also filmed a scene for her reality show there. But the historic  celebrity guests top them all. Charlie Chaplin vacationed at the ranch, and famous western artist Ed Borein spent quite a bit of time there. Each time Borein came, he adorned the mantel piece of the main cabin with a new installment of his cowboy sketches. Asked why he never finished the piece, he replied, “Well, if I ever did, then you’d never invite me back.” He died before the mantel was completed.

Jessica Schley and Jessica Moniot face off on horseback.	Rancho Oso is home to several children’s sleep-away camps every summer, including Operation Purple, a camp for kids with a parent in Iraq. Dave Gonzales, a local celebrity by some measures, runs the camp. “It’s a wonderful way to help those kids get their mind off the war. They come here and relax and have a good time, and get to be kids again.”
If you’re a history buff, you’ll get a real kick out of the historical 1835 Flores Adobe at the ranch entrance. It’s the oldest building on the ranch, and has survived mud slides, brush fires and earthquakes. The walls are around three feet thick, and as a result, the inside stays cool in all degrees of hot weather. It’s still very authentic, even though it’s used as the main office. They didn’t even get electricity “until fairly recently,” says Bill.
“And we have running water–most of the time.” If you decide to do some horsemanship while you’re on vacation, Donna and the other wranglers are there to show you the ropes, literally. They want people to have a hands-on experience, and not just do the dude thing. “Some people come and just want to ride. That’s fine. But others want to have the whole experience, and we can do that too,” says Donna, who’s been	A covered wagon is a cozy place to stay.
The old adobe.	wrangling for decades, in Montana and Colorado, and now here. You can also attend a stock dog demo, taught by Adrian Lopez on Saturday mornings, followed by bucking bull demos, and a chance to watch a blacksmith hammer out a set of horseshoes with his anvil and forge.

The Discovery Channel has caught on to the value of what the ranch has to offer, and capitalized on it. They sell “the experience” in package deals to internet users through

Original Sketches by Famous Western Artist, Ed Borein
A sample of Ed Borien’s cowboy art on the mantelpiece.

www.excitations.com. You can buy a specialty tailored weekend getaway for two, or a whole group, with a trail guide, roping lessons, and cow-poking to boot.
While you’re at the ranch, be sure to say hello to “Possum” the steer, and his other friends at the petting zoo, including two enormous pigs, a goat, and some chickens. These animals know how to relax. They hang out all day, waiting for the ranch guests to come tickle their chins and feed them treats. The pigs have mud baths to wallow in, and straw beds to sleep on in the shade. That’s what real vacations should be like, ne c’est pas?

A Penny Wishing Fountain
A fountain is ready for tossing in your lucky penny.

	As for the bears, there haven’t been any sighted in quite some time. Ranch Oso has become a bit famous, you see, and they just don’t take to the celebrity lifestyle. Unlike some ranch guests.…
Editors' Note: "Oso" means "bear" in Spanish, and when Rancho Oso was named there were many bears, but now they are rarely seen.